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Welcome to my imperfect email.

As always, every week, we’ll send a question that will help you reflect on your own imperfect life, inspired by this week’s episode.

Our guardian angel Dr Emily is blessing us with her presence this week to deliver a divine message about surviving crisis.

Talking us through how to ride the waves of distress, Dr Em gives us some really practical advice for when you’re overcome with overwhelm.

If you’re in that moment right now, we love you, and we see you.

Over and out,

Bell

We'd love to hear your answer to this question. If you're in the mood to get vulnerable and share your writing, send it through.

In this episode, Dr Emily introduces how to understand your ‘window of tolerance,’ the cost of being overwhelmed for too long, and what happens when we slip into avoidance.

OF COURSE, this episode is delightfully sprinkled with practical strategies that you can do right now, in this moment, to ease the burden of the overwhelm.

Dr Em, this episode was an emotional regulation for the ages.

To help your mind and body calm down*.

Fill up a basin with cold water*, hold your breath, and submerge your face. Repeat this 3-4 times. If you’re not at home, splashing cold water on your face also helps. If you’re close to the beach, go in for a dip. (27:34 - 30:06)

Try twenty minutes of exercise that elevates your heart, to a point where you can’t hold a conversation. The exercise you choose is up to you, but for acute distress, avoid walking (won’t burn off the adrenaline), or boxing (may exacerbate the anger response), try running, star jumps or HIIT. (30:07 - 35:09)

Progressive Muscle Relaxation is not a meditation, but rather an active way of releasing tension. In this epiosde, Dr Em takes us through a micro progressive muscle relaxation! However, they are also readily available online. (39:49 - 46:48)

There are many different incarnations of paced breathing, however a very common one is box breathing. To active the parasympathetic nervous system (which brings you back to calm), pay extra attention to lengthening the exhale. (46:49 - 50:58)

*these recommendations are general in nature, and as they are to do with the body, we advise you to seek medical advice if you’re unsure.

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Love is connection, that’s why it’s so vital. As cliche as it may sound, love really is everywhere to me. 

There is love in my work mate buying me a chocolate bunny because she knows I was eyeing the one on her desk in a moment of weakness. There’s love in my Mum making soup when we’re sick despite no longer living at home. There’s love in my fiancé turning the coffee machine on for me before he leaves for work.

There’s love in the stranger who smiled at me in the grocery store. There’s love in my Dad gifting me a book he thinks I’ll love. There’s love in the way my Nana rarely says ‘I love you’ but is always right there when you need the comfort only she could bring.

There’s love in my cat greeting me at the top of the staircase with hooded eyes on a late night. There’s love in my Grandfather turning off the news program that he watches at the same time every night to speak to me on the phone because I’ve forgotten the time difference caused by the oceans between us.

There’s love in the way my friends hold my hands as we say goodbye to someone we’ve loved and lost too soon. There’s love in my sister sitting on my couch on a random Wednesday night throwing her head back in laughter at my rendition of a dramatic story from the weekend before. There’s love in the way my nieces squeeze me extra tight when they hug me. 

There’s love in the way my nephew turns his attention away from one of his electronics to tell me about his school day. There’s love in the way the kids that I work with, who are often labelled as ‘bad’, ‘problematic’ or ‘antisocial’ recognise me and respond with a wave, a smile and a ‘hey miss’. 

It can be easy to miss, but if you look hard enough, you’ll see the love. More importantly, if you can share that love to one being (whether it be person, pet, or plant), you’ve done your part. 

Anyway, lots of love - Lisa xx

Thank you so much for sharing your reflection with us, and with all of you! Always vulnerable responsibly.

Last week on a little more imperfects we debuted our brand new book club.

Unlike a regular book club, a bit of a book that changed my life, a bit, club, focuses not on the whole book, but on the bit that had a profound impact on you and your life. The bit could be one line, a certain character, or even the book cover (no judgement here).

Ryan was first up, and presented to the club The Midnight Library by Matt Haig.

A bit that changed Ryan’s life (a bit) was the exploration of choices, and the age old saying, the grass is greener on the other side.

This is set to become a semi-regular segment, and we’ll be hearing from Josh, Hugh, the rest of the team, and maybe even you, about a book that changed your life, a bit.

If you’d like to join the conversation, jump onto our patreon here, and find the community chat dedicated specifically to books (my dream).

Did this newsletter make you think of someone in particular?