Were you forwarded this email? Sign up here to get the next edition!
Welcome to my imperfect email.
This episode we’re talking dirty.
Or, well, gritty.
Get a grit,
Bell
Bell Northeast
what lights you up, that you’re not currently doing? why?
We'd love to hear your answer. If you're in the mood to get vulnerable and share your writing, send it through.
Grrrrrit
With Dr Emily Musgrove
Do you think you have grit?
Research has shown that the most common characteristic of elite performers and high achievers is grit.
Understood as the passion and perseverance for very long term goals, Grit is not about natural ability or talent, but rather how we choose to grow.
Your favourite resident psychologist, Dr Emily Musgrove, is back in the studio this week to talk about how you can become a grittier person!
We also look inward, as Josh asks how to maintain grit when it feels like your inner critic is overwhelmingly loud.
How to cultivate grit
Find your interests. (11:00 - 15:46)
It can be really hard to know what our interests are, especially if we have been told what to like from a young age. The best way to figure out what lights you up? Try a whole bunch of stuff and see what sticks.
Be specific with your practice. (26:42 - 30:00)
10,000 hours sounds great, but to ensure that your practice is good practice, it needs to have a few key components. 1) set yourself goals, and celebrate when you reach them, 2) give it your all, 3) seek feedback from others.
Hope. (35:01 - 42:06)
As we know from a previous Dr Emisode, hope is a verb and requires action. It’s also really important for perseverance and grit.
Find purpose in your grit. (59:04:1:06:09)
Questions of how this perseverance is contributing to the greater good, or positively impacting something or someone is a great place to start. With this intention, grit isn’t about being the best in the world, but how you show up to the world.
Want to know what you value? Our very own psychologist, Dr Emily has created a simple guide to help you uncover your values.
And because we value you so much, we’re going to give it to you for free.*
*All you have to do is share this newsletter with just one other person.
As soon as they sign up, you’ll get the worksheet straight in your inbox.
Or send them your unique signup link: {{rp_refer_url}}
what is your relationship like with success?
My relationship with success is complicated.
I feel it’s something ever changing. I think the complication comes from the ambiguity of the word itself, and the many different ways it can be measured. For the longest time, I think I’ve measured success the way many people do — through achievement, status, recognition, or the job title on a business card.
It’s so hard not to.
Being talented. Being productive. Being someone people noticed. They’ve always been measurements of success in my mind. But today, as a father, a husband, and as a 31 year old with anxiety and ADHD, who is not where he thought he would be in life, I’m finding other ways to define success — as challenging as it may be some days.
The conflict lies here — I measure success a lot by people doing what they love. I really find it hard to separate being able to do what you love in life, with being able to do what you love for a job.
Because I am consistently able to do what I love. Do I love getting immersed in film? Yes. Do I love having in depth conversations with people? Yes. Do I love writing poetry? Yes. Do I love being a father? More than anything.
So why does it feel like I’m failing? Because I drive trucks for a living?
It could be a number of factors. I find it difficult to not label or assess someone based off their job title. Or perhaps that’s just the fear I have, that people will do that to me.
Yes I drive trucks for a living. Am I your typical truck driver? Not really. Can you be successful and still be a truck driver? I’m sure you can, absolutely. I think I’m torn at the necessity of the job overtaking the spark of my passions.
My mind just struggles having such a creative drive, a musical and performance background, and being stuck at a point where I’m unable to use these skills and be in touch with this part of me.
I think it’s just knowing I have more to offer the world, and as I’m not in a position to achieve this at the moment, I don’t often feel successful. I don’t often feel I’ve succeeded in life.
But when I step away from everything for a moment, and take a breath? I remember there are many ways to measure success. And I have succeeded in so many areas in life. Despite my brain trying to drag me down sometimes, I have so much to be grateful for, and proud of.
Maybe success isn’t becoming the person I imagined at 20.
Maybe success is beating cancer at 21, and starting a family. Maybe it’s becoming the dad my children need, the husband my wife deserves, and the person who leaves people a little better than he found them.
Maybe it’s even finding the time across the day in between all of life’s demands, to write this reflection.
And if that’s true, perhaps I’ve been more successful than I’ve allowed myself to believe.
Jake
Thank you so much for sharing your reflection with us, and with all of you! Always vulnerable responsibly.
On August 19, at the Balwyn Cinema, Dr Emily will join Hugh, Ryan and Josh for our first ever live podcast recording, answering YOUR questions.
TICKETS ARE ON SALE NOW, but only for subscribers of A Little More Imperfects (you’ll need the code word from our most recent subscriber episode).
You could also WIN your way there.
Randomly drawn, one lucky winner will receive a GOLD CLASS DOUBLE PASS.
We’ll fly you in for the event from anywhere in Australia or New Zealand, OR, if you’re already in Melbourne, we’ll send a limo to your door.
To enter the competition, you must be an A Little More Imperfects subscriber AND you’ll need the code word given in the most recent A Little More Imperfects episode.
After you’ve entered the competition, if you refer a friend to sign up to our patreon, you’ll get another entry into the draw. So more chances to win!
The competition is open now, until the end of June, when it will be randomly drawn.
Did this newsletter make you think of someone in particular?