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Welcome to my imperfect email.

As always, every week, we’ll send a question that will help you reflect on your own imperfect life, inspired by this week’s episode.

There is something very powerful about a handwritten letter. Just ask Hugh, or Josh.

Or Reuben, our guest in today’s Vulnerabilitea House, who read aloud his letter to his younger self.

Make sure the tissues are nearby,

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We'd love to hear your answer. If you're in the mood to get vulnerable and share your writing, send it through.

Incredibly vulnerable, Reuben talks Hugh, Ryan and Josh through what it felt like in the 24 hours after the assault, how he knew, undeniably, what happened to him was wrong, and why he chose to report it.

We talk about the intricacies of healing, privilege, and having a world class difficult conversation with the ones you love.

And then, Josh asks Reuben how you can best show up for your friends who might be going through something similar.

Reuben, it was such a privilege having you in the studio.

The day you tie your healing to someone else’s consequences, you give them the keys to your recovery. (1:08:43 - 1:09:09)

_{This sentiment was fundamental in helping Reuben move forward with his life in the aftermath of the trial result.}

Live your life like it’s a movie. (1:06:16)

_{When making a choice, Reuben often reflects that if there was an audience rooting for his growth and character development, what would they want to see him do?}

Just be there. (1:18:46 - 1:25:03).

_{In response to Josh’s question about how to be a supportive friend, in Reuben’s experience, the most powerful thing you can do is just be there. Although you may have no idea what they’re going through, being there for a friend is often all that matters.}

Or send them your unique signup link: {{rp_refer_url}}

This reflection is from everyone’s favourite Imperfects team member, George.

I was born in 1993, the youngest of three kids.

“A soul that wanted to be born” as mum says. (She says that because I was unplanned) but I interpret that sentence as “a kid who loves life” and one of the BIG reasons why I love life is because of mum. It’s impossible to write what she means to me in a single letter, so I’m gonna condense it down to five quotes.

Two from experts who have been on the show, and three from Kath & Kim.

#1. Something in Ben Crowe’s episode really resonated with me, he said “the most powerful words a parent can say to their child is ‘I love to watch you play.” I’ve heard mum say this my entire life. I grew up playing sport, and still do in my 30’s, and every time I look over to the sideline, mum’s there. Watching me play. When I was a kid, she set up a basketball hoop above the trampoline and would throw alley-oops to me for hours because she just loved how much I loved it. When we were really young, mum would hire video cameras from the local library and film us playing. These days everyone has footage of their kids but I feel so lucky that I’m able to see the joy on my 2-year-old face and the 90’s fashion.

#2. Maggie Dent likes to say “no matter what”. When I was a teenager, and started to go out, mum was always a phone call away, no matter where I was, who I was with or what time of night. The first time I drank underage, of course she wasn’t happy with me. She was shaking her head as she brought me over some fried food with a side of Panadol. The Panadol was the “No Matter What”. This feeling is so deeply ingrained, that I know I have a safety net with mum and can go to her with anything, no matter what.

#3. “Kel and I are having some issues at the moment” (strong pronunciation on the isss-sews). Mum showed me that relationships aren’t perfect, and that’s okay. I was 5 when my parents separated and have been in a blended family for almost 30 years. Mum will often quote this if she’s having issues with her Kel, and it’s an invitation for us to feel safe to tell her when we’re having issues with our Kels. The way she uses humour in tricky situations is one of my favourite things about her.

#4. “I’ve gotta decant the dipping sauce.” When Kath says this, she’s trying to make herself busy because everything is under control. Even though our childhood was pretty chaotic at times and it wouldn’t have been easy being the mother of three in a separated family, for me, it always felt like she had it under control. She dropped us off and picked us up from school, and made us beautiful home cooked meals every night. It’s not like we were flush with cash, I have no idea how she managed to make it work. We were also “the house”. You know the house all the friends go to before a party? We had the cool mum, the fun mum, the funny mum. The mum who made sure we had everything we needed and decanted the dipping sauce. I definitely took that for granted.

#5. “Let it go Kath, let it go. Empty your mind. Oh empty. That was quick.” Growing up, I always got the sense that life will work out. It’ll be great, in fact. Mum was able to let go of stresses and live in the moment for her kids. We were late to school a lot because we were having fun at home, or we looked so peaceful sleeping that she didn’t want to wake us. When she’s overwhelmed, she’s able to quickly empty her mind and just focus on us. She wants us to know we’re the most important thing in her world. I need to get better at making sure she knows how important she is to me.

If I was a soul that wanted to be born, I’m glad she was the mum I got. She taught me the power of laughter, play and connection. Thank you for always being there, the unconditional love and the countless Kath & Kim quotes.

Happy Mother’s Day, I love you.

Thank you so much for sharing your reflection with us, and with all of you! Always vulnerable responsibly.

What is parental burnout? How does it differ from parental stress? How can you actually recover when being a parent is, well, a full-time job?

Dr Emily is back in our favourite little corner of the internet (A Little More Imperfects) to answer as many questions as she can, asked by you guys, about the topic of parental burnout.

Things this episode dives into;

Come and join us!

Did this newsletter make you think of someone in particular?